uncertainty

There’s an uncertain feeling rising in my lungs 

filling with beats and the sounds of a drum 

it crashes down onto me like these monstrous waves 

these feelings of fear and horror 

creeps towards me 

trying to put me away in a grave. 

 

There’s uncertainty all around us 

when we cross the street or hit a curb 

we are riding in the darkness of the night 

in our motorcycles or in our hurt 

 

People tell me that this feeling will eventually fade

that when they stare it’s only because my eyes glimmer 

even when i’m in the shade 

 

There’s a darkness fondling my body 

even when I wish it away

there’s a power slithering 

like a snake hissing at my pain 

 

Maybe i’m fickle 

or maybe it’s the thought of being misplaced

like a book on a shelf in a library 

I’m always filled with words 

but somehow they become erased 

 

I am filled with 365 chapters 

of sentences and thoughts

my mind is a story 

my soul is distraught. 

 

I am shattered in places 

I did not know could be broken 

my eyes glimmer like glass

my skeleton like structure 

tries to swim in this agonizing ocean. 

 

There’s an uncertain feeling rising in my lungs 

filling with beats and the sounds of a drum 

it crashes down onto me like these monstrous waves 

these feelings of fear and horror 

creeping towards me 

trying to put me away in a grave.

 

– j.ds

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